jimmy gave me this coin the day we got married. he couldn't have possibly known what it would mean to me one day. it is scratched and dull. but i cling to it and believe in what it says with all of my heart.
2 Corinthians 12:
9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Okay. Confession time.
I am weak.
I admit it. Right now I am feeling weak. I'm tired, I'm sick, I'm worried, I'm stressed. I'm scared.
I am weak.
But He is strong.
I've had to hand my fear over. Hand my worry over.
I have had to accept that I can't do it all. Sometimes I like to think I can. But I can't.
It's okay that I'm not wanting to make anything. It is okay that I quit Project Life for now (I really don't want to put the past 2 weeks down on paper and I'm giving myself permission not to).
It is okay to say I MISS HIM. That I'm better when he's here.That I don't know what I'd do without him and that I'm terrified that one day I'll find out.
It is okay that I just want to love on my girls. Some days I want to hide from the world. Some days I just have to get out to keep from going nuts. Some days we stay in our pajamas all day.
I am giving myself permission to be sad. I am giving myself permission to cry after the girls are in bed.
I am weak.
But He gives me strength. My faith gives me strength. My children give me strength. The love I have for my husband gives me strength.
The fear will not win. The "what-ifs" will not win. The "could it happens" will not win. The "I wishes"will not win.
Strength and faith and positivity will win.
But for now I revel in my imperfections.It is okay to say that I feel weak.
We are all weak. Flawed. Struggling. Even though not everyone will admit it.
I am weak but He makes me strong.